If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My room smells like vodka and shame
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I need to stop coming to work sober
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
