Who wears a wallet chain?!
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
