I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize
