I wanna bring you to show and tell
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Slut skills are useful in every country.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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