17 year olds will be the death of me.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
