I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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