therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize