Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
so much tequila, so little girl.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize