No subtext here. People are naked.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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