Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
