Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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