Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
