She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Pooping to opera.
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