i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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