Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
