Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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