butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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