Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
