I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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