WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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