The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Everything about him screamed your future.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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