Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
i out mim tonsoeep
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