i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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