We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
