Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
