Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
