Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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