Me. At least after what I've been through.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
