her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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