so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You need a sexual gate keeper
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
