you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
