Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
