I'm really into asian looking animals
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
