is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
