margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize