Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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