I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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