Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
