I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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