Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
BRING THE BAGELS
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
