We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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