how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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