are you so shy because you have an std?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
