This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
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