She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize