I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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