you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
