Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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