Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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