Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
